Sex can take many forms - as a couple or with a stranger, romantically or bestially - depending on the reason for the act. Wanting sex to satisfy a desire or need for sex to have an orgasm, the motivations differ according to the individual but also according to the moment.

The desire for sex

The desire for sex: a physical need or the desire to satisfy an impulse?

Does the individual really need sex?

Except in the case of sex addict, whose impulses govern the daily life, the woman or the man does not have a vital need for sex. He can observe very long periods of abstinence without really endangering his physical or mental health. Even more blatantly, an asexual individual, who feels no sexual attraction to anyone, may never have sex. However, the influence of hormones, the desire felt for a person or love can make a person feel a strong desire for sex.

Satisfying your sexual urges, to fight frustration

If the need for sex is not vital, most individuals, male or female, sometimes feel irremediable impulses. Once the desire is stimulated, it is difficult not to go through with it without being frustrated. In this context, the desire for sex can lead either to consummate sexual intercourse or to masturbation until orgasm. Sometimes, too, a long period of abstinence is, in the opinion of those concerned, physically frustrating, to the point that the individual engages in solo sex without any particular prior stimulation. This is particularly true for men with high testosterone production.

In the end, it is difficult to decide between the desire for sex and the need for sex. Sex addiction is a good example of the need for sex when the asexual individual demonstrates that abstinence does not harm. While hormones, a physical factor, may play a major role in the need for sex, the psychological reasons for having sex tilt the balance towards a simple desire for sex. 

Women and the desire for sex: the reasons behind their urges

While men are said to want sex often and easily, women on the other hand generally have a lesser need for sex. Among the reasons for women's sexual urges are physical attraction, the desire for pleasure and love. Few women express an uncontrollable need for sex, except the desire for motherhood, which can lead to an irrepressible desire for sex.

On the other hand, sometimes a woman may not feel like having sex. Hormonal disorder, weariness towards the partner, lack of desire caused by the routine installed in the couple or personal problems that cause stress and anxiety: the factors are numerous. Fortunately, there are just as many ways to rekindle the desire for sex. 

"Wanting you" or needing sex: the boundary between desire and purely physical sexuality

Is sex just a desire for a particular person or can it be a simple impulse that can be satisfied with "any" partner?

It all depends on the circumstances. When the desire for sex is motivated by love or physical attraction, only the person who is the object of the feeling will be able to satisfy the need for sex. On the other hand if the impulse is hormonal, a priori only the orgasm counts. In the same way when the individual wants sex in particular circumstances - to satisfy a fantasy or to show himself that he can seduce and please - the need for sex is abolished from the notion of identity, the physical act being at the heart of the concerns.  

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